The State of Things

So, Pop music is rubbish isn’t it? Nowhere near as good as it was in the 50s, 60s or 70s. Actually, now the 80s has become cool for the first time since, well, the 80s, we can add it to the list. Not long now, I assume, till Vanilla Ice and PJ & Duncan join the likes of The Human League, Wham! and Rick Astley in the cool box. Time, it seems, is the best P.R. But the noughties? You only have to ask an out of touch, aging rocker to find out that music is dead, man. Worryingly though, a great deal of young people seem to be holding the same views. Whilst I’m sure a lot of this is due to people inexplicably still paying attention to the words spouting pathetically out of Paul Weller’s flappy little mouth, I’m starting to think that some far younger people have come to this conclusion on their own (i.e. without anyone telling them what to think).

In short, there is a load of great music out there, and contrary to what a lot of people claim, you don’t have to look that hard to find it. The rise of the producer has lead to some of the most creative chart music that has ever been, err, produced – listen to anything by Timbaland, Kanye, The Neptunes (and no, Pharrell is not hot – the fact that so many women find him so attractive is conclusive proof that women are obsessed with fame and money), Xenomania or Future Cut and tell me they aren’t geniuses.

Xenomania is the team behind most of Girls Aloud’s catalogue, and if you’ve taken the time to listen to 2005’s Chemistry you’ll probably have realised that it’s better than most rock records of this decade, and almost all of this shite that people keep referring to as ‘Indie’. Actually, while we’re at it, ‘Electro’ too – both of these terms were around in the 90s, and they meant decidedly different things. It’s not dissimilar from the way ‘R&B’ has come to mean ‘wank’, when it formally described beautiful, soulful music. Rhythm and Blues no less. Oh, and don’t bother telling me I’m a hypocrite, I’m all too aware of that already.

ANYWAY, I think a lot of people shun Pop because it seems the stars are just puppets, with the whole thing geared towards money. In reality, I don’t think it really matters where the music comes from, and the fact that there are now teams of people who work on every aspect of an act is great. The performer is only one part of a huge machine. It’s just too easy to criticise. People forget that Elvis (that song always makes me shiver) never wrote a song. Aretha Franklin never wrote a lyric. Almost every Motown record was a product of the mechanical production method, and look at how they’re all looked back upon.

The thing I think a great deal of people forget is that when we browse the back catalogue of music, it has been vetted for us. Do you really think that our children will be browsing records in 20 years time and come across a Chico CD? No. He will, thankfully, have been forgotten. There have been millions of Chicos throughout music’s chequered history, and they don’t make it this far. Pink Floyd made it this far. The Velvet Underground. ABBA. These records keep selling because they are timeless, and so when we look through the catalogue, we are presented with the cream of the crop. We browse with rose-tinted glasses. I mean, come on, if we look at today’s scene in that way, it’s pretty bloody rich. I’m not saying don’t listen to old music, hell that would be ridiculous, I’m just saying look at the whole picture.

So next time someone tells you that music has gone to the dogs, sit them down, tell them to stop worrying about being branded a ‘conformist’ (surely the most offensive ‘C’ word nowadays) and play them some Justin Timberlake. Ram a bit of Love Machine into their ears (anag.). And if they still don’t get it, send them home with a copy of the brand-spanking-new Noah and the Whale album.

Because it’s really, really, fucking good.

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